American Shorts

Levi Johnston: Too Sad For A Headline | September 3, 2009

What is with Levi Johnston?

Gail Collins quirkily reports/editorializes:

Besides selling a fantasy about how easily a semi-delinquent, unemployed father-to-be could be turned into Prince Charming, Palin also spent her campaign trying to give the impression that running for vice president and taking care of five children, the youngest a baby with special needs, was as easy as falling off a snowbank. Politicians who don’t want the federal government to address child care issues like to imagine that’s true. It absolves them from dealing with the question of who takes care of the kids when women make up almost half the work force.

So it would be helpful to know if Palin was “always in a bad mood and she was stressed out a lot,” as Johnston claims. But really, we’re going to have to wait for a more reliable witness. Maybe Piper or Willow are preparing their memoirs.

Levi and Bristol split up last spring, a few months after the birth of their baby. (“It was the happiest day of my life, but it was also terrible because my family couldn’t be there,” he writes. “I didn’t think Sarah wanted my mom around all the cameras because she had been arrested for selling prescription medication a week and a half earlier.”) The Palins have accused him of trying to cash in on his relationship to the former vice presidential candidate, and we can add this to a very brief list titled “Sarah’s Accurate Depictions of the World Around Her.”

This kid is now writing articles for Vanity Fair, and he’s the only one not in on the joke. Levi, have you ever seen a reality TV show? It’s not about who wins the date with Bret Michaels in the end. It’s about who can humiliate herself the most while doing it.

Levi, I want you to have this backstage pass.


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